Thursday, April 18, 2013

Boredyak Beard Challenge Wrap

Judging by the lack of entries, not many of you knew I was hosting a beard contest this winter. That's probably all the better. It might have taken away from my snowboarding if I had to wade through a bunch of entries and actually judge them or have others do the same. Instead I had the easiest number of entries possible. Just one.

This guy. Before.
This guy is Ian from Wisconsin. Ian knows rule #1 for contests: To win, you must first enter. Sometimes that's all it takes. Here's what Ian could do with five months of beard growing.

After. Portrait of a winner.
Not bad for the tender age of 18. Tell me it doesn't look like he aged 10 years. Tell me that's not a face that will populate your mountain man fantasies. Fullness of whisker, uniformity of color, that 'come hither' 1000-yard stare. By the looks of it he didn't trim his moustache or even his head hair judging by the hair tie/'gotta pose like a model just to contain it' stance. I might dock points for apparent eyebrow tweezing, not very mountain-manly, but there ARE NO POINTS! What's more, this cat knows what to do once he's got a face full of fur.

'Murica ROCKS!
The funnest part about having a seasonal beard is creatively shaving it come warm weather. Ian looks like he might have found another beard contest to piggy back on. He's got the French 'stache/soul patch combo added to the sideburns. I don't even know. New Orleans biker? Here's hoping he keeps that for a while and then shaves it off asymmetrically.

For having all this fun with facial hair, Ian won a Poler Mini Duffle, a Salomon 3/4 sleeve shirt, a Superior Threadworks beanie and a Nike DryFit long-sleeve. Not bad for taking three pictures and otherwise just having an awesome beard.

Ian will be looking to defend his crown next winter. The rest of you, PAY ATTENTION!


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