Monday, July 27, 2009

The 'Funnest' Way to Blow Your Hand Off

I know a skillful craftsman who builds boats out of posterboard, balsa and a couple coats of lacquer. These models are faithful representations of World War I era warships. A production company might use them for background minis in a military movie, they're that good. After a day's work to finish each, he's ready to display them at a backyard cookout.

Minutes later, the same family and friends who were admiring their craftsmanship commence tossing explosives toward these defenseless boats (whilst simultaneously tossing back alcoholic beverages).

The craftsman (background right) watches helplessly.

Like a veal calf's slaughter, these boats' destruction is the sole purpose in their short lives; all for the entertainment of the gathered, drunken masses. Their only gratification comes from the (not so) odd, short-fused firecracker that explodes near its launcher's hand or head leaving him (no female was brave/stupid/intoxicated enough to join the gunpowder hurling) in various states of incapacitation.

In the end, tiny cardboard hulls take on water, beer bottles soothe burns and a good-time vibe settles over the onlookers. Another year avoiding major injuries perpetuates this game of chance.

Risk-seeking revelers, rewarded


  1. thats hilarious and I'm sure a good drinking game can be built around it!


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