In Pain in the Ribcage

Man am I bummin'. The last time I snowboarded was two weeks ago. That wasn't so bad for a while, but in the last five days my home mountain has gotten five feet of fresh. And I'm still hurt.But let me press rewind for a second to catch everybody up.

Where we're going, we don't need snow...

The original accident happened on January 20. I remember, not only because I keep a journal, but because I finished watching Obama's swearing in on TV before I left for the mountain. When I pulled in to the lot, it was empty. It was also a Tuesday after a holiday weekend, but regardless of the reason, liftlines were nil. It was the middle of Mt. Hoods June-uary and a sunny, 50° afternoon felt pretty good to me. No pow in sight, but park laps and a little work on my notoriously lagging switch riding were just fine by me. Everything was fine until one stretch of flats that I decided to traverse switch. I know now that I have some edges that I need to detune. I did that right when I got home that day. Problem is, that's the sort of thing you want to do in advance. You see, catching an edge at speed is kind of like teleporting. One second you're cruising along, the next you're taking your elbow out from between your ribcage and trying to catch your breath. Little kids and skiiers and everyone else on the slopes just happens to be on that same run. They all ride past wondering how someone could get wrecked so hard on a trail that's flatter than the parking lot. Yeah, that's me. Kids who were conceived the day I started riding look at me like I just told them Barney is just a guy in a suit. Humble pie, slopestyle. I tried to ride a few more times (for Baker Banked Slalom and the Greasebus trip), but only ended up making things worse. So here I sit, haven't seen the snow in weeks. Summary complete.

That bums me out, but it gets worse. I've got an amazing trip to Canada planned and it's only two weeks away. This trip includes four days in a row of riding at Baldface Lodge. Yup, I ponied up for a big trip this year and now I take some unexpected time off. Not what I had in mind. The good news is, I'm getting better. I'm going to try to ride Sunday. Brave the crowd and take a couple pow turns. If not, I'll be the lodge lizard. No shame in that.

Won't be long now before they tear us to shreds.

So, until I get back out there, does anyone know anything about hurt ribs? My doctor (yeah, it was so bad I went to see a doctor. It was so bad I couldn't even play ski-ball without pain) was about as useful as a football bat. He poked me, I said it hurt. They x-rayed me, said it wasn't broken. Take two of these if it hurts too much to sleep. Useless. Meanwhile, I look in the mirror and my left ribs don't even look like my right ribs and I'm wondering, which ones are the spare ribs and which ones are the baby backs?

Bored Yak does not endorse cannibalism

Anyway, enough self pity. I hope everyone else is happy and healthy and shredding that pow. And for those of you also hurting, I pour a little out for you, too.

Board Exam: 2010 Never Summer Premier F1-R

Another day at Baker's Legendary Banked Slalom and I chose to inspect another new board. This one is Never Summer's 2010 Premier F1-R. My initial impression of the board was that it was heavier than average hanging from my foot on the chairlift. That's easy enough to make up for, depending on how it rides... Also, the nose and tail shapes were different, supposedly to enhance float in powder. Too bad I wouldn't get a chance to test that today.

Dangling from my boot

The ride on this beast was stiff and damp. And beast is an apt title. Everything I'd heard about Never Summer boards charging was true on this ride. That was the most noticeable characteristic of this board. Hardpack, chunder, tree bark, no match for the Premier F1-R. That said, this is not a board for pressing and jibbing. Maybe if a tree jib is in your way the F1-R might attack it for sport.

What else? Well, I'm amazed at the differences in companies' reverse camber applications. Never Summer runs what they call R.C. Technology: rocker and camber. Basically, it has a camber point under each insert and rocker between the inserts. On the snow, this translates to less catchy turns with plenty of power out of turns. I would rate the pop as moderate. Nothing surprising either way.

Accompanying R.C. Tech is NS's Vario Power Grip sidecut. Instead of having one radius throughout the sidecut, NS uses three. A deeper one toward the tip and tail, a shallower one near the inserts and a straight line at the waist of the board. This creates six contact points during turns instead of the standard two. This really translates to stable turns, even on the Baker boilerplate.

This board excels at hauling ass in any condition. It can handle anything you can up to a 60° ice skating rink through trees (OK, that might be a little extreeme). It is a freeride ruler, though not a board I'd want to ride everyday, due to it's stiffness. Those racers in the LBS could shave some seconds ripping with a stick like this one. Though it won't be out 'til next year, here's Never Summer's site to check the dirty when it goes live next fall.

The Politics of Eco

One of the most important and controversial subjects in snowboarding (and life in general right now) is that of climate change. Everyone has an opinion and the topic is far more complicated than any one person can imagine. From board manufacturers to blog manufacturers everyone sees things from a different angle and agreement is scarce as Sasquatch these days.

The reaction to the 'green' products popping up in the snowboard industry is similarly varied. Reports from SIA indicate an increase in such products this year. This led to one of the more memorable revelations to me this year. O-matic is coming out with a board called the Extr-Eco next year. The topsheet graphic takes a bunch of shots at the eco ethos. Todd Richards broke it all down in Shayboarder's comments and it turns out he tried to get a price on eco-friendly materials from his supplier only to find out that some other companies have exclusives on those materials, so only they can use them for the next two years. I've got to agree with Todd here, that's a bunch of bullshit. If it's intellectual property, that's one thing, but recycled materials... help me out here. Isn't that supposed to be for the greater good?

O-matic's Extr-Eco Shayboarder photo

I know that when Holden came out with the hemp fabric that they use in their outerwear they took out a three-year exclusive on that, but that seems more like an innovation to me. That and they were just starting out and that was a big selling point for them. It could have been their ass had they not done that.

Later in the same comment thread, Brad from Salomon chimes in with a contradiction, saying that eco-product sales are "horrible." Going on he says, "Anyone who thinks that eco sells product or makes money is horribly misinformed." Wow. I don't have nor know where to find sales info like this, so I'm going to have to defer to those wiser than myself. It makes sense though: spend more money on an eco-friendly product (and there's no debate that they cost more) and you better make up for it in sales or you're in the red. This is where I think companies need to be replacing their conventional lines with eco-friendly instead of adding to them. It's just counterintuitive the other way and ends up doing more harm than good.

The flaw with this line of thinking is that the price of conventional products doesn't match the full cost. Economic cost, yes, but not ecological. It's a short-sighted figure, not taking the depletion of resources into account. This exceeds the scope of my blog, but really goes to show just how deep and multi-faceted this debate is.

My take on the whole thing is that eco is no trend. Tight pants and neon colors are trends. Eco is a whole new way of doing things. Revolution might not be the right word, but it's the only word that comes to mind. Fashion trends (and maybe even rocker) will come and go ad infinitum as tastes change. The green movement has nothing to do with fashion (except for, you know, green fashion) and everything to do with function, in this case trying to live more harmoniously with the Earth. We want it to be around as long as possible. And yeah, I know, there's a growing subset that is getting into green because it's cool. Hopefully it leads to life-long changes and not more green-washed consumers.

I just had to get one in every color!

This is similar to the way greenwashing can lead companies to be more sustainable, though. Check out this article to see what I'm saying. Here's a good summary paragraph from it:

Counterintuitively, greenwash -- real or perceived -- can actually be good for a corporation if that business genuinely wants to become green. As soon as a company starts hyping its environmental responsibility, legitimately or not, it invites greater scrutiny from the public. As a result, social pressure to do the right thing increases. More important, employees become more aware too. If a company isn't living up to the standard it sets publicly, they'll complain, and they'll work to change their company, because nobody likes to work for a cheat.

Yes, this means we're going to have to make some phone calls and write some letters (or at least e-mails and blog comments). It's the least we can do.

This brings me to some easy things we can all do to shred more lightly on this Earth. Consume less and/or make what you have last longer. Something as simple as spray-on waterproofer can help your outerwear last another year and it's a lot cheaper than buying a new kit every year. [Side note: I know that spray-on waterproofer isn't the most innocuous thing, but it beats producing a whole new jacket, for example. While I'm at it, I also know that bamboo production isn't harmless either, but it's better than fiberglass. We're trying for 'better' here, nothing is perfect.] Carpool or take shuttles to the mountain (you know, when you're not hiking). Remember that shuttle from Portland to Mt. Hood Meadows that runs on waste vegetable oil?

The Greasebus, baby, open for service!

Check out non-profit organizations like Protect Our Winters. They have a wealth of good information and put your membership and donation dollars to good use. Another good group is the Ski Area Citizens' Coalition. They compile a report card of resorts (only in the western US, unfortunately) that rates their "environmental performance." They also give details so that you can tell who's greenwashing and who's setting a good standard. Not everyone can make his or her own snowboard, but there are things we can all do to lessen our impact. Plenty of people and groups are already out there laying the groundwork in this movement, so to call it all BS would be a stunning disservice to guys like big mountain Jeremy Jones, Nicolas Müller, Wolle Nyvelt, Mike Basich and Mike Parziale and organizations like Grease Not Gas, Ski Area Citizens and POW among countless others.

No matter what your stance is on global climate change, it's clear that there are things we can do to turn the tide, but it will require group effort. And what is a group but a collection of individuals. Just like someone has to be the first to show up at a rally and the first to sign a petition, it's all about getting the ball rolling. Don't think of yourself as just one, think of yourself as one more.

Absinthe's Flipside Out Now on iTunes

All the dudes over at Absinthe Films have been doing a TV show about the making of their films for the last three years. The most recent season, which covers the making of Ready is out now on iTunes for 9 bucks. That's for six, 20-minute episodes. Drop another $6 and you can get Ready, too. Make it an Absinthe marathon and watch everything in one night while polishing off a bottle of their namesake beverage. Now there's an idea... Problem is, I'm already two episodes in and the liquor stores are closed.

I'll catch you on the flipside whenever you're ready...

The show is really good insight into what those guys go through to make a snowboard film. All kinds of craziness in different countries, resorts, backcountry, down days, urban spots, you think it up they've lived it. Last year, Wolle got buried in an avalanche and Brusti gashed his arm punching through a window. How could they possibly compete this year? For less than a Hamilton, you can find out. Bump it up to a Jackson and you can find out, watch the finished product and have enough left over to deliver some economic stimulus to the 7-11 for some snacks...

Board Exam: 2009 Gnu Altered Genetics BTX

Most people right now are previewing next years boards that aren't even on shop shelves yet. Not me. I'm still hopelessly mired in the present. These are boards you can actually go out and buy. Not only that, but you can probably find them on sale right about now. Which, in the case of this board, is the only time I could possibly afford it. I give you Gnu's Altered Genetics:Dope topsheet, but how does it shred?

While cousin Lib Tech has the super-freaky Cygnus X-1, Gnu has to settle for the slightly less freaky Altered Genetics. I use the term 'settle' in full sarcasm, the AG is a high-tech board with a high-tech price to match. The rep blabbed about a bunch of stuff that I don't really understand: weird polymers and mutant woods and what not. When you run your fingernail across the topsheet, it sounds like you're zipping up a zipper. Like one of those pictures that has a different image when you look at it from the side. The topsheet only has one graphic, though, bummer. Has anyone done that yet? It's made out of beans, says the rep. I can dig it. Cut the shit, Yak, HOW DOES IT RIDE ALREADY!? Oh, I'm glad you asked...

This is the board I've been waiting for. As I've said in the past, the banana tech makes boards feel longitudinally looser for easy pressability. Feeling soft on butters is something of an illusion caused by the banana shape. You see, the board's natural shape, with no external pressure, holds it up at the nose and tail, where with a cambered board you work against the shape to do a nosepress. What's the point? A board like the AG can simultaneously butter like a park board and rail like a race board (even through a storm of sticks and ice balls, in this case) without the extreme sacrifices of either. The best of both worlds!

This board was a lot of fun to ride and I was just cruising hardpacked groomers at Baker. It held a carve on ice as well as anything could and when it came time to leave the snow, it popped like a champagne cork atop a podium. The board responded great and felt light and lively underfoot. A great ride for the trees. I didn't get to ride it in pow, so I can only speculate there. If it's as good there as it is everywhere else, it might, might be worth that $600 price tag. For explanations of all those things I don't understand just check out Gnu's website.

Board Exam: 2009 Burton Supermodel X

While I was at the Baker Banked Slalom, I got a chance to demo some boards. The first one was this pretty little thing from Burton. I had it set up with Burton Triad EST Bindings. This was my first real try with the EST system. I took a lap on my friend's board with it once, but it wasn't set up for me, so it wasn't exactly a fair shake. This time I had the stance width and angles dialed in, so everything was comfy. Without turning this into a binding review, the system was good, but not amazing. I thought the straps were the best part. They seem to have gotten that part just right. I'd like to try it baseless or with the thinner Shredbeds. Preferably in powder.

Moving on to the board, my demo was a 164. Combine that length with a 10mm taper and that's a whole lotta board. Nevertheless my first impression with the thing dangling from my left foot on the lift was that it was quite light. Then I remembered what the rep said, " The 'X' means more stiff, more damp and more expensive." The price I can't change ($700), but I'll put the rest to the test. The runs at Baker that day were groomed and anywhere from soft to icy depending on the light. I was hoping for powder, which I think this board would excel at, but it wasn't happening in bounds that day.

Lightweight hanging from my foot, lighter weight wallet and a lightweight on the mountain

The Supermodel X is nothing if not stiff. All the way around, it's the stiffest board I've ever ridden. Not that I've ridden that many boards to this point, but still. This lends to a responsive board, quick edge to edge, but not the most comfortable or forgiving on off-center landings. For all that stiffness, you might expect a lot of pop, but it was average at best.

Stability at speed is where this board shines. It tore through chop and bumps without hesitation. When it came time to turn, though, the edges weren't what I hoped for. Burton's edge technology is the pressure distribution edge. I gotta say, I didn't notice any benefit over a regular edge. It got into the turn quickly, but couldn't hold on. Granted, this was hardpack and ice, but the same conditions with Mervin's Magne-Traction or Never Summer's Vario Power Grip were far more manageable. Something to keep in mind.

In the end, I'll admit I rode the wrong size board. I would have like to ride the 156 in those conditions. Keep that in mind when I say this board just wasn't for me. I'm not sure where this board is supposed to fit in when Burton already has the Malolo and Fish that are tapered powder sticks. This board is less tapered and stiffer. It would probably do well in pow, but not as good as the other two. Maybe it's made for speedy, straight-line racing. Until I figure out where I would want to ride this 700-dollar board, I'm staying away. For all the gory details check out Burton's website.

Best Halfpipe Contest Ever?

I just caught a replay of the first ever Burton Canadian Open and it might have revived my interest in halfpipe snowboarding. They still have video of it up at GO211. I suggest you check it out. Why? First of all, Tricia Byrnes and Jeff Bridges, wait no, just kidding PAT Bridges do the commentary.

Neither of these guys did commentary

Pat and Tricia probably know more about snowboarding than you do, you might learn something. If Pat and Tricia are reading right now, well that sets up an interesting paradox. But let me digress to another tangent... It reminds me of that time I skipped class in college to watch the world championships of juggling on TV. Nope, not kidding. I don't remember what class I skipped. I don't remember who won the championships. Why did I watch it? Because the commentary was done, to perfection, by Penn Jillette (of Penn and Teller fame). Let me tell you, it didn't even matter what was on the screen. I don't even think he was watching most of the time, but it was solid gold. I learned a little about juggling, but mostly I laughed my ass off. The Canadian Open on GO211 was kind of like that, only far more informative and with snowboarding. Sometimes they were commenting on the action. Sometimes they were talking to various guests in the booth while the action went on, undiscussed. It wasn't Willie McMillon and Todd Richards at Natural Selection, but it really was a lot of fun. If you don't know anything about Bridges yet, check out this interview conducted by my good buddy and all around great writer and snowboarder Colin Whyte. It's a primer. I've never met the guy (or Tricia for that matter), but he seems like someone it would be cool to chat with... over a beer... on the chairlift.

The action, though, was sick in it's own right. Even if you already read about who won, check out the video. You haven't seen halfpipe riding like this, probably ever. Jed Anderson is so stylish that it almost made me want to ride halfpipe. Almost. Chas Gouldemond had it gould-ing on as well. TJ Schneider was in full effect. See what I mean? When do you hear names like these in pipe contests!? Tons of riders I'd never even heard of were rippin' it up. Justin Lamoureaux, for example. I'll have to watch the slopestyle replay tomorrow. If it's even half as good I'll probably need to change my underwear midway through.

Baker Banked Slalom: Holland, Ricker and Strohl Take Pro Divisions

It was another sunny day at Mt. Baker for the finals of the Banked Slalom. Word from the course was that riders were going down faster than free beer. The carnage took did not discriminate. Pro men and younger ams were taken down alike. Put together two clean runs and your reward was probably some duct tape. Minibike over at Board as Fuck didn't mince words, "Sketchiest course off [sic] all time." You can find all the results over at the official website, if not now then soon. Here's a quick rundown of the winners.

Next Gen: Hank Kennedy
Juniors: Gus Warbington
Younger Ams: Logan Beaulieu
Older Ams: Craig Newbury
Women's Ams: Danielle Davis
Women's Masters: Weeg Simmons
Masters: Marcel Dolak
Mid-Masters: Dave Wray
Grand Masters: Jim "JT" Taylor
Pro Masters: Ludovic Strohl
Pro Women: Maelle Ricker
Pro Men: Nate Holland

Yup, Mr. X-Games 4-peat himself. Originally from Sandpoint, ID, he's no stranger to the Northwest. This is, however, his first pro win at the LBS. Congratulations, Nate. Maelle took home her third gold in a row. Better start working harder if you want to catch her, ladies.

Of course good times were shared by all and plenty of stories got tossed around from the mic by master of ceremonies Gwyn Howat. For that, well, you just had to be there. Here are some photos for a little taste of what you of what you missed.

Victoria Jealouse, the bank robber, disappears into the vault

Maelle Ricker en route to a win

The spoils


The victors: Graham Watanabe, 2nd Pro Men and Nate Holland (l to r)


The brain trust: The Howat Family

24th Legendary Banked Slalom: Finals Set

Saturday was a sunny one here at Mt. Baker. Friday's snow passed through and we were treated to clear mountain views in every direction. The course was quick, if a bit icy. The riders who could stay on course put up some fast times, but more than a couple cartwheeled past gates. One victim was Blair Habenicht, who fell twice and missed a gate on Friday. He made the most of his Saturday run, qualifying 8th in Pro Men. He'll be back Sunday looking for his first gold duct tape since winning young amateurs in 2001. They're really quick posting the results over at the website, so check it out if you want to see who's where for Sunday's final. I'll let the pictures I took do the rest of the talking.

Classic view from the start shack


Turn 1: No looking back


The course snakes off down the mountain


Check your time and hope it holds up


Then it's off to the parking lot for salmon and beer by the fire

I also got a chance to demo a Burton Supermodel X with Triad EST bindings today, so I'll have that review up later. Check back tomorrow when I'll have all the pictures from the finals and the names of the winners.

Red Bull Snowscrapers Results

I just watched the big scaffolding hip gap in NYC that was Snowscrapers. Shayne Pospisil took the top spot and the $50K check with a big backside '900.' Torstein Horgmo came in second with Scotty Lago and Travis Rice wrapping up 3rd and 4th respectively. Torstein survived a crazy fall that saw him skid off the side of the take-off on his last run. He then got up to the top of the drop-in and made his last jump. Ballsy.

The format went like this, all 16 riders went at it in a 60-minute jam session which then cut to the top 8 who competed head-to-head. Oddly enough, it looked like the #1 rider from the jam rode against the #2 rider. Then, 3 vs. 4 and so on, instead of the traditional 1 vs. 8, 2 vs. 7, etc. The bummer in this case went to Shaun White who got knocked out by Torstein Horgmo in round 1 of the elimination. If the scores went down the same, he would have gotten knocked down by #8 Daniel Ek, too, so maybe that one didn't matter. It still seemed a bit off.

The weirdest thing about the contest was that the riders couldn't get enough speed even though the drop-in was 90 feet tall, so they got a slingshot start from two workers or a winch. The riding was pretty good, though. Not 'Air & Style' good, but OK. Pospisil's '900' in the finals deserved first place for sure. Rice had some nice rodeos, Lago ripped off some quality spins and of course Terje cranked a nice method or two. Terje also attempted a one-footed air, but washed out the landing. Super ballsy, especially considering some of the riders were barely clearing the gap fully strapped in. They gave him the best trick at the end, I can only assume it was for the big method.

It might be my inexperience with hip jumps, but it seemed like the announcers were adding an extra 180 to all the tricks. For example, in Pospisil's '900' he took off forward and landed forward. I'd have called it a 720, but I defer to the experts. Maybe they just wanted it to sound bigger or maybe I'm wrong. It wouldn't be the first time.

I thought it was cool to see Shayne win a big event like this. He's not exactly a household name, even though he rips hard. For proof, check out last year's King of Quarters and last week's Air & Style. Hopefully he had a bunch of family and friends in attendance, being a Jersey native and all. I was also really impressed with Daniel Ek's performance. He's pretty new to the scene, but he threw down with the vets and came out with a nice finish. Hopefully we can see some more of what he's capable throughout the season.

Another cool thing is that some smaller form of the jump will be kept up for a week or so for public use. How cool is that? If you're anywhere nearby, go check that out: East River Park at FDR and Houston. Now snowboarders have a chance to play out their dreams. Internal monologue, "It's come down to this last jump, for all the fame, glory and 50,000 dollars. (S)he's got to beat an 85.33 for the win..." In the words of Valient Thorr, that's what I'm talkin' about.

Here are the rest of the results, 5-8 are my best guesses based on scores from the first round of eliminations.

1. Shayne Pospisil
2. Torstein Horgmo
3. Scotty Lago
4. Travis Rice
5. Daniel Ek
6. Shaun White
7. Bjorn Leines
8. Terje Haakonsen

Next stop for me is the Mt. Baker Legendary Banked Slalom, where the goal is to not leave the ground so much. Check back for more on that one later...

Competition or Community?

This weekend two of the most opposite contests in the history of competition are going down: the 24th Mt. Baker Legendary Banked Slalom and Red Bull's Snowscrapers. One is a long-standing race that gets hundreds of groms, pros and old souls together for a few days of racing with nothing more (or less) than locally-made prizes and a trophy fashioned after a roll of duct tape. The other is a first-time mega-jump with uber-sponsors and hyper-promotion (and-I-love-hyphens!). Battling it out for spin-to-win supremacy and 100G's in prizes will be 16 hand-picked combatants.

Tonight, the first ever Red Bull Snowscrapers kicks off in New York City. The scaffolding jump is reminiscent of Air and Style, but with a hip landing; a gap hip, if you will. I've never seen anything quite like it. Not sure what will go down. Initial reports say the speed isn't quite right, so I hope they got that fixed. Anthrax (the band, not the disease) is set to make an appearance. Oh yeah and the prize pool is 100,000 bucks, so everything is huge, large and/or epic. Check out the info at Red Bull and watch it live at GO211 from now 'til around 6pm Pacific Time.

Tomorrow the qualifying runs start for the Mt. Baker Legendary Banked Slalom, one of the most storied snowboard races of all time. Tomorrow night, Jamie Lynn's band, Kandi Coded, will rock the Joowanna Café in Maple Falls. Coincidence? Probably not. This is one event that might be more about people getting together off the hill than throwing down on it. Run in the same natural halfpipe since 1985, the LBS course changes a little every year, but the basics are the same: banked turns and high speeds. On the same run are everyone from 10-year-old amateurs to 60-year-old grandfathers. The last chance to qualify is Saturday, then the finals on Sunday determine who takes home the tape. Oh yeah, they have a baked salmon dinner and a bonfire on Sunday, too. That's it. No live broadcast, no commercial interruptions. Money donated to causes infinitely exceeds prize money because there is no prize money. Really. A contest with no prize money. And it's not a qualifier for other contests that do have prize money. If you don't get it, you might have to drive east on WA 542 to find out.

An interesting connection: Travis Rice and Terje Haakonsen are listed as competing in both events. Also, the band Valient Thorr is playing Snowscrapers while they played in Kandi Coded's spot last year. Maybe the two events aren't so different after all. It's all snowboarding, ya know?

It's a little late to get to NYC, but GO211 has the live coverage of Snowscrapers right now. I'm making the drive up to Baker tomorrow and might even have a blog from there for you. Not that the internet can capture the legendary vibe, but maybe it will get you to check it out for yourself next year...