Double Helicopter

BOOM!

Thanks to A Man and Ft. Lewis for making this otherwise military people-killer into something of a punchline. If you don't know you better axe somebody. And I didn't download the damn video, so I can't show you if you axe me. 

27th Baker Banked: Another Legend

Yup, last one to the party, no doubt, with the 27th Annual Legendary Baker Banked Slalom info. Had to make the haul down I-5 yesterday with some stops. Then, crashed out early because today was a powder day at Meadows. Who'da thunk? That crazy ice layer is still lurking, though. Tripping heel edges you thought were going to spray powder all over the free world. Serious damage done today. In a real way. To my meat box. Not some metaphorical 'destruction.' I feel broken. Enough about me, though, things got legendary over the weekend. Let me tell you what eye saw.

Saturday. Hard to get motivated when it's been raining all week. More on that later. Managed to get down there and check out the race. Even demoed some gear: Jones Hovercraft, Yes Pick Your Line and Now IPO bindings. All good in different ways. You will hear more, but here's the teaser.

2013 Yes Pick Your Line

2013 Jones Hovercraft and Mountain Twin flanked by Yes men

JF Pelchat sets me up with the Now IPO.

Mervin boards I didn't ride. Look for C3 BTX next year.

What about the race? I watched a few folks from the top and a few from the middle. Not much middle ground as far as the race. Folks were either slaying or getting bucked. Gnarly-ass course. Makes me wonder whether I really want to get accepted to ride in it. Gwyn Howat said that for the first time ever some of the banks were over her head. And she's no pixie at six feet tall. Another first, mid-week the course was an icy mogul field and the crew was praying for rain. You read that right. They can't just power-till the course, so the only natural cure would be the four-letter word we usually curse. It came. Course softened. What could have been a bobsled track got downgraded to 'challenging.' Thank the rain. Ha. Just make sure it knows its place. For example, don't rain on the salmon feed/handplant contest. Thank you. 

Who is this, Marben? Where's the light from, God?

So much food they were giving it away at the end.

The grindage up top was looking tasty, too.

Sunday Finals. No demos as my crew again lacked motivation and the demo tents were packing up early. I did get a glimpse of some pro men's runs and some groms' after them. Let me tell you something, it's easy to appreciate video-part-quality snowboarding when it's on a screen in front of you, but it's even easier to appreciate when it's carving down a hill in front of you. Professional athletes on a closed course. Sit back and watch. If you can't watch Josh Dirksen take his LBS turns and aspire to replicate them, you're either Terje or you're numb. Not everyone films a three-minute shred-porn section every year, but, much like REM said, everybody turns. Sometime. Still, no one ever says, "I want to turn like Josh Dirksen." Well, I do. Maybe next year I'll ask all the micro-groms who their favorite riders are. I will take special note of those who respond with Dirka-Dirka-San. All that said, this is a results-based game, no one cares what you look like, you gotta WIN! Overheard in the lodge before the awards, "Dirksen has all the qualities you envy in a person except the ability to win." I should have asked that dude his name, I'd love to have an attribution for that. You know who you are, third floor of the lodge around 4pm. Of course he goes on to take second AGAIN. Maybe he just knows that silver is the only real duct tape color. Everything else is an impostor. Who would want that? Temple Cummins came in third because the only place he ever lands at this event is on the podium. Terje won because he's that good. He had to bounce to Norway and the World Snowboard Championships before the awards, though, because he's in demand. And because he's that good.

Scotty Wittlake praying

Scotty Wittlake slaying

Another special moment for me that day was Kevin Pearce's presence. What can you say? Has a time ever mattered less? Kevin looked more stoked than anyone at the awards ceremony. What an inspiration to anyone who's ever had to come back from a serious injury. Traumatic brain injury to gnarly banked turns in a couple years. Ending in Banked Slalom entries for life. See you next year, Kev. Wear your helmets, kids.

Watching Milo Malkoski race and win his first gold was pretty cool, too. You can read all about it on his proud pop's blog. What he won't tell you is that dad was pacing/racing Milo down the first half of the course. Talk about a stoked dad. Milo's time was just a little slower than the old man's, too. What does he get when he finally beats you, Johan?

Who says the groms don't take it seriously?

Hearing the crowd go nuts when someone from Glacier wins is amazing. Makes me wish I could have been there when Lucas DeBari won in 2007. Must have been off the meter. My first year was 2008, when Temple won it and I thought that crowd was nuts. I couldn't even hear Danielle Davis's name getting called this year. And this wasn't her first win. Glacier loves its own.

Sarah Taylor, "I get second every six years: 2000, 2006 and 2012."

Maelle Ricker owns the women's pro division. This year marked her sixth win in a row. And she won by almost five seconds. She also wrecked into the fence in her second finals run. Like a true pro, she unstrapped, hiked up around the gate, took a bow, buckled back in and finished her run without a DQ. Is the mark of a pro the flawless winning time or the unwillingness to give up?

That quote sums it up.

Finally, I just can't top Baker for getting together with all my shred buddies. I have quite a few that I only see there. I wish I could see them more often, and I wish I'd stop missing some even there, but as long as the Legendary Banked Slalom goes down, at least I'll know where they'll be for that one weekend in February. You guys know who you are. See you next year!

Mt. Hood Meadows Chairway 2 Heaven, Sunday

Yes, CHAIRway. Apologies to Led Zeppelin. Here's the deal, speed dating on Meadows' Blue chair. If you know anything about this chairlift, you know 'speed' isn't usually anywhere in the mix. It's a nine-minute ride barring any slowing or stoping, which usually happens due to the exit ramp being among the gnarliest lines on the entire mountain.

Anyway, the lift lines are split into one line for ladies and one line for fellas. I guess it's hetero only, look, I don't make the rules. You get nine minutes to get to know one another and then decide. Did he blow you away with his use of 'bro' as almost every word in a sentence? Did she flawlessly navigate that dicey exit ramp? Perhaps it was meant to be. Make your way to the 'Meadows Mingle' near the bottom of the lift for some mellow tunes from Barry White or Luther Vandross while feeding each other chocolate-covered strawberries by the fire pit.

Take a long walk on the beach over to Mt. Hood Meadows' website for full details.

The Winter Beard

This is a winter beard. I haven't touched it since Thanksgiving, except some mustache trimming, so I can eat respectably. Contrary to the belief of my snow buddies, this is not a year 'round feat of facial hair. Plenty of folks wouldn't even recognize me in the summer months. When that thing goes so goes 10 years from my face.

Right now is supposed to be mid-winter. I should be in mid-season form. Instead, Mt. Hood has less than a third of it's normal snow. I've ridden so little, my legs are atrophying. The sun is shining on Portland so much that folks are sporting flip-flops and tank tops. Meanwhile, I have to check the address on my mail to make sure I'm in the right town.

This is Portland. In February. The trees are starting to bud out! Flowers are popping up thinking it's April already.

Why bring up the beard? I'm holding it hostage. If it doesn't snow another foot at Meadows by the time I get back from the Baker Banked Slalom (check my twitter @Boredyak for updates and results), I'm shaving that thing off. I must admit, I've already had to trim it because of a bald spot that developed from my constant fidgeting and plucking. 

You hear that, snow!? Show yourself or the beard gets it!

This beard is for you, snow! A token of my respect for your ability to chill my chin. Regardless, your seasonal visits and their resultant mounds of fluff always bring me joy. What now? Now you only come around every once in a while. Where's the joy in rain? I drive for hours to get to where the rain turns to snow. Now that place is getting farther and farther away. Mountains are no place for rain. No one ever made rain angels.

Board Exam: 2011/2012 Lib Tech Travis Rice Limited Edition Snowboard Review

What the rep said: All-mountain freestyle; mellow magnetraction; C2 power banana for better edge hold, stability and pop; true twin shape

Stats/Setup: I checked in at 6'1" (1.85m) and 170 pounds (77.3kg) when I rode the Travis Rice Limited Edition in a 157 with Salomon Dialogue Boots (size 9.5) and some old Technine MFM Pro bindings at Mt. Bachelor, Oregon. Count the prepositions in that sentence.

Conditions: Hardpack, ice, some slush

Check out Lib-Tech's site for the goods

First impression: Dig that limited edition Art of Flight graphic by Mike Parillo

The Ride: A nice deep sidecut has the T.Rice going edge-to-edge like a tweaker standing on a rocking chair. When the turns open up, the mellow magnetraction shines. It's not as aggressive as the MTX found on some of Mervin's other boards, but it will hold on even when you're carving like a Euro hardbooter. I don't know exactly which boards have which version of magnetraction, but my guess is the deeper the sidecut the less need for a deep magnetraction. It works for this board anyway. It charges hard and holds on tight.

Another shining area is the stability. Even at 157 when I'm used to something longer, I was comfortable at speed, through chop and falling off stumps and jumps. This is a damp board that likes speed and likes a challenge.

The pop was pretty good. I've found Lib's C2 poppier than full rocker (or their earlier BTX), but not as poppy as full camber. This is to be expected as it has rocker between the feet, but camber to the contact points. The C2 does give you that little bit of buttery flex advantage over camber, though, for those who like to get your press on.

Bottom Line: It's not going to get you into a helicopter followed by a helicopter all by itself, but it can do everything else. In general, a hell of a lot of fun to ride. I wish I could've ridden the 161 and ridden it in a wider variety of conditions because this seems like a great all-mountain freestyle board.

Similar Boards: My Never Summer SL-R

Bonus Package: As a bonus to the Limited Edition board, the LE package includes The Art of Flight book, DVD and Blu-Ray all in a collector's edition box. It's a rad little package that I paid $80 for. Check it.

The art of book, Field Notes for scale

What's inside

The collector's edition, pop-up box