NW Demo Tour Comes Through Meadows

The good news today was that I got to ride some killer snowboards. The bad news was that it was raining, foggy and/or windy depending on where you were on the mountain. The quasi-bad news is that every board I rode today was more fun than my current board. Whether it was the effortless pop of the Salomon Answer, the straightline speed of the Salomon Burner, the tight-turning stability and dampness of the Never Summer Herritage-R or the all mountain freestyle sickness of the Lib Tech Dark Series C2. Overall, the fun of riding rad new boards totally blew away the crappy conditions. Full reviews will follow on all those boards. When, not if, I become the proud owner of a new board, I'm sure I'll drop a gushy one on ya.

Breaking News: STOLEN BOARD!

This just in from Shayboarder, her board and bindings got stolen right from out the back of her pickup. We're looking for a Never Summer Lotus 157 and Union Force SL bindings in size M/L in the white/black/red colorway. The theft went down at Copper Mountain, CO but it was during a huge event, so that thing could be anywhere by now. She doesn't remember the serial number on the board, but says it was something like 10008 with a 'V' stamped next to it for the voided warranty. Check out the specifics on her site. If the stickers are in tact, it's a dead giveaway, but also look for a sticker between the bindings, hiding the serial number. Here's what we're after:

Union Force SL bindings, worn

Never Summer Lotus 157

Let's get this gear back to an upstanding member of the snowboard community.

While we're at it, everyone go to your snowboard(s) and write down their serial numbers. These are the only way to truly identify your board in case of theft. Some boards, unfortunately, don't have them. For instance, my one run-in with a thief happened with this board which had no serial number:

Lib Tech TRS 157 (no Magne-Traction)
Tech Nine MFM Pro binders in white, yellow, blue - S/M
Stolen from Timberline, spring 2007

Please take care of you boards. It only takes a minute for an unscrupulous rider to rip you off. When that happens, let's take care of each other and get that shit back.

Snowboarding for Grown-ups? No Way!?

Here's a good excerpt from a magazine article I stumbled upon:

"Although any winter footwear could tie in with the soft binding, it’s best to select supple boots with good liners, such as Sorels, to soften the pressure of the front strap. Stiff boots and rigid bindings become an option after you reach intermediate ability."

Wow! This might be OK if it was printed during the Carter administration, but alas it is from Western SnowSports, Winter 2009-2010. Clearly what they mean is Western Skiing.

I say that as I look at a picture of myself and three friends, all snowboarding in Sorels. North Dakota in the 90's follows no rules for anyone's chronology. It's like you jumped into that crazy lady's wardrobe and popped out in another time and place. You better hope the one in Sorels is destined to rule the world, otherwise you're just cruisin' for a broken ankle.

Be Gone, Red Plum

Spam in my snail mail box!

Am I the only one in the world who hates the Red Plum advertising packets that cram my mailbox every week? Judging by my building's bulging recycle bin, no, I'm not. No one needs 10¢ off a microdermabrasion treatment! Today, I finally looked around for a way to unsubscribe from the devil's direct mail list and it was surprisingly easy. Here's the link. You can thank me by saying so in the comments. No postage required.

You won't be missed.

Bored Yak's Guide to Holiday Gift Giving

Seems like every culture or faith tradition is celebrating a holiday right about now. Most of them, of course, have been co-opted by savvy capitalists into guilt-ridden, gift buying, debt racking, spend-fests. Fear not, noble denizens of Earth - and those tuning in from afar - it doesn't have to be this way. With a little ingenuity and good, old-fashioned elbow grease you can both stun everybody on your list and have a little left over to tuck under the mattress. Or you could spend yourself into the kind of debt death would be a welcome reprieve from. Either way, the Yak is here for ya.

Spend Until It's Gone

1.) Get 'em one of these. I know it would shut me up for a while. Actually, come to think of it, that thing looks a bit tall. Like it's asking to roll over more than an impatient dog trainer. It probably wouldn't shut me up for long at all.

For the guy who has everything.

2.) Heli time. Everybody wants it, no one can afford it: what better gift! If you've got some money left over, spring for some extra life insurance. You never know...

3.) I don't know the first thing about snowmobiles, but that seems like the next best thing. How 'bout this one? Maybe someone could buy it for me and teach me how to ride.



4.) A lift ticket. Maybe splurge for a lesson.

5.) A boot dryer. My mom got me this one from Dry Guy a few years back. Now I can actually ride multiple days in a row without feeling like I'm walking though the Everglades to get to the lodge.

6.) Magazine subscriptions. Why give just one gift when you can give a bunch of gifts staggered out at regular intervals? You all know the usual suspects, but don't forget the oft overlooked frequency The Snowboarder's Journal. Or the totally overlooked.

7.) The most electrifying snowboard base-layer since your skin itself. The Airblaster Merino Ninja Suit. Everyone knows about the Ninja Suit by now, the combo balaclava, long-sleeve shirt, long underwear that protects your skin from snow like its shadowy assassin namesake. Well, now it's baaaack, in wool. Warmer? Probably. Stink-free? Thanks to wool's natural anti-microbial properties, yes. Still a killer Halloween costume? You're God damn right it is! I'll take mine in black, size M, please.

Makes me duck just looking at it.

8.) Gift certificates. More thought than cash, less thought than everything else. Here's a new twist, micro-lending. Start out by giving your favorite person a $25-gift certificate to Kiva. They then pick where they want that money to go. From farmers in Uganda to grocers in Bolivia, these entrepreneurs just need a little change to get something going. Then when it gets paid back you can take it out or re-lend. It's a cross between putting your money under the mattress and donating to charity. Is there anything better than helping out your fellow man this holiday season? Nope. Do it and tell them I sent you.

Save a Little Scratch

1.) Use your talents. Maybe you can write poetry, take amazing pictures, knit scarves, build life-sized replicas of Boba Fett out of dryer lint and chicken wire or something else that. These gifts, while not free, have a personal touch that extends well beyond their monetary value. Put together a DVD of old family movies and pictures and watch those of an older generation will be sure to thank you.

1b.) Work for free. Whether it's your sister who has an unfinished basement in her house, your folks who've been meaning to get a fresh coat of paint in the guest room or your friend who could use a full tune on his snowboard; when you can help someone out with something that they would normally spend money on, it's as good a gift as any.

2.) Freebies. I've got boxes of snowboard-related stickers. Chances are, if you bothered saving them, you might have such things laying around. I know a few kids that perk right up when they get stuff like that. Hook 'em up! One caveat: do not give away used stuff unless it's to a second-hand store. This qualifies as re-gifting, tread lightly.

Come to think of it, tread lightly on all these money-saving tips. If you have money for 'real gifts' and you don't deliver the goods, you better have an explanation for an offended recipient. Happened in my family once and the resultant rift still hasn't fully healed. Best to iron these things out in advance.

3.) Make a trade. You know web-sites, he knows woodworking. How about a web store front for a splitboard and a pair of snowshoes? You get the idea. Just don't get too hardcore with the bargaining.

4.) Surprise. Show up at the door when you said you couldn't make it home. That might be the only present they need.

'This damn economy' needs some stimulating, but I suggest you don't spend money that you don't have. Debt should be a back alley avoided, not some lighted dance floor to be discoed upon. That's all the free financial advice I've got. Stimulate if you can or maybe take 'er easy this year and make up for it in cheer. Either way, Happy Holidays to you and yours.

Mental Expansion

Anthony Bourdain once likened experiencing Asia to dropping acid. "Your mind expands," he said. He plans to move to Southeast Asia with his wife and daughter in the coming years. (Outside, 11/07) Now after having been there, I know a little bit more about what he means.

Bourdain talked about the color in the region. That was the first thing I noticed, too. Starting with the cabs outside the airport. Most of them are pink. Pink and green, pink and yellow, some yellow and green or green and red maybe. I don't know if Airblaster is doing their colorways, but it was quite the visual stimulation.

Then the mix of sights came closer to home. An Obama poster. A billboard for a Green Day show in Bangkok. Tidbits of globalization in an otherwise foreign land.

Without a doubt, though, this was not America. Distinct Thai flavor came through with every turn of the head.

You don't see architecture like this in Portland.

One Buddha head in the roots. Extra signficant because...

All the rest are decapitated (Wat Mahatat, Ayutthaya)

No idea what's going on in this traffic circle.

Another mythical animal (elephant dragon?) from the same circle.

Gold light posts and bad traffic; the streets of Ayutthaya.

Elephants amaze me. A friend volunteers at an elephant rehab center.
I got to play with a month-old baby and it was about the cutest thing ever.

The drippy light street. The lights form a triangle of rain every night, one street only.

And that was just the first three 'shake off the jetlag' days in Thailand. Part two: a week in Cambodia providing water to villagers and seeing the wondrous temples.

Could Be Worse

Black Ice, Kids. Don't Mess Around!



I must have driven that road up to Mt. Hood a hundred times. No incidents. This day, above freezing all day, I hit the wrong spot at the wrong time and it put me into a snowbank. Then a guy in a Ford F-250 emblazoned with a frequency TSJ sticker hits the same spot and crashes into me. In the time it took to get the hell out of there 10 people must have gotten all cocky on the same spot of black ice. We left a couple of flares to mark the 'slow down or spin out' zone. With any luck no one died on that spot that day. Hmmm, reminds me of an article I wrote last year...