I Wonder If They Need An Official Blog Sponsor

Need something to do this weekend in Portland? It's gonna be hot out, so maybe taking your ass to the coast and learning some water sports is in order. Failing that, we get a snowboard rail jam and a park skating contest on back-to-back days. Let me give you the dirty dirty.

First off, the Cricket Campus Rail Jam has been gnawing its way through college campuses in the west for months now. What started in Arizona will come to a spinning, sparking, pressing and sliding conclusion in Portland's Pioneer Courthouse Square (not really that close to any college campus, but whatev'), Saturday, May 30 at 1pm. They better have the snow cone machine on ludicrous speed to keep up with the projected mid-80s heat wave. Oh yeah, and Todd-would you rather-Richards is going to be there. He needs no intro and he is still high-larry-us. Probably the best MC/host type of all tyme-ah. All the proceedings are 100% free, so if nothing else, show up for the product toss. Maybe you'll score some panties from the energy drink sponsor.

Next day, not much different. Still predicted to be hot. Still sizzling, amateur, board-on-rail action. Still free. This time in a skate park. The Zumiez Couch Tour hits Glenhaven Skatepark and it doesn't let up until everyone has heat stroke. Actually it runs from noon 'til 6. Plenty of free junk from sponsors. The Enjoi team will be there to show you how it's done and/or write their names on things. Finally, when you're so sunburnt you can't even see past your swollen eyelids, the bands start, so you don't have to worry about it. Kandi Coded (featuring Jamie Lynn) starts things off and Emery shuts them down. Because it's a school night, the festivities will end while the sun is still high in the sky. Did I mention sunblock? We Portlanders aren't used to the cloudless skies. Exhibit A: my flaking arms from our last bout of cloudlesness. In addition to the requisite energy drink and skate sponsors, this one also has a burrito sponsor (for the last time, they're not owned by McDonalds anymore, there's nothing left to feel bad about) and a meat snack sponsor. No one goes hungry here.

Kandi Coded, in case you forgot

Bottom line: free 'action sports' (am I the only one who doesn't like that phrase?) entertainment all weekend long. Throw in a couple after-parties for the grown folk and you got yourself a reason to show up late for work on Monday. You might drink enough that you regret it, but trust me on the sunblock. You'll never regret that.

Taking Design Back

If you were to name the first 10 snowboard companies that come to mind, chances are Aaron Draplin has worked for at least 9 of them. Beyond, hell, he's even done jobs for Mr. America-Episode 44-'A New Hope'-Obama himself. In the design game, this guy has turned it to 11 more than Nigel Tufnel ever did.

What I'm here to get across is that starting now (actually last night, hence the following pictures), Mr. Draplin's mastery can be found on the walls of Office at 22nd and NE Alberta, Portland, Ore. and you should open your eyes and turn your head toward it if you can.

Mini sample of Draplin's plywood logos
(a shifty Colin Whyte turns his head in the fore)

Why would you go see it when you can just check out his blog or stare at one of the countless pieces of gear with his visionary Hancock on it? First of all, you can check out a super-compilation poster with "Pretty Much Everything Up To May 27, 2009." That's right, all on one orange sheet. Second, that's not all stokes, he's got some wall pieces. Which leads me to an anecdote, but first, a picture.

Fore: Gary - the World's Smartest Dachshund
Back: Jim - Aaron's dad (white hair, aloha shirt, bigness)

I was with some friends getting ready to head to the grand opening. My buddy's wife says, "I'm not going to dress up even though I look like a soccer mom," to my friend and I, who are both in t-shirts and jeans. I'm about to say, "That's OK, he's not a 'real' artist," but catch myself right around the 'real.' My meaning was, he's not 'that kind' of artist. You know the kind, the martini-sipping, beret-wearing kind. Truth is, he's as real as artists get and we could use more artists like him. A trite complement, to be sure, but here's why: Passion. If you've ever read one of his blog posts (and I mean really read, followed all the links and looked at all the pictures) you start to get the idea. Logos from every epoch, continent and vocation. What sealed the deal for me, though, was this video.

America Is F*cked.......(Graphically at least) from Jess Gibson on Vimeo.

Emotional stuff. Did you catch the spot towards the end where he nearly cries? He's legitimately concerned about the future of his craft and has true respect for where it's come from. I wish someone was out there to go off on me like that when my work wasn't up to snuff. After all, how is anyone ever going to get better? It would make my day if he wrote a letter to the sign company in Sedalia. Give them a piece of his mind, maybe send some links to some good work for inspiration. That's why we need more artists like him, hell, more people like him. People who give a shit. I'm against institutions in general, but if anyone is fit to start one, it's this guy (and Robin Williams from Dead Poets Society). Draplin Art and Design Institute, DADI. I want a nickel for every item that sells with that on it. Ha. Rambling. Here I am talking about living with passion while typing away indoors at the new idiot box. Moving on...

Aaron entertains all ages

The Aaron I met at the opening was friendly and social, then again, it was his party. Vodka drink in one hand, he spoke candidly about the show.

"It took more time to put the stuff up on the wall than it did for me to make it."

"I started planning this 5 days ago!"

Comic hyperbole or technical mastery? Everything he says could end in an exclamation point. He was always keeping people laughing and bringing passersby into the mix. Percentage of passersby who were new to him: probably pretty low as most of them were members of the Portland shrederatti. Oh yeah, he's from the Midwest, too, so he gets bumped up a couple extra rungs on the rad ladder just by picking the right parents.

If you missed the opening last night, you'll never get it back (at least not without some serious pull). Hurry and you can still check out Draplin's work at Office, 22nd and NE Alberta, Portland, Ore. Buy some field notes while you're there.

What is the End?

I celebrated Memorial Day the best way I know how, snowboarding. That's right, one more day. This time it was all about the park. Ben and I found out the hard way that the lower park was closed. This required a flat, Timberline-traverse (mostly one-footed as skating was necessary every few hundred feet) down to the lower lift. Finally we made it to the Mile and got a glimpse of the upper park on the ride. Best park I've ever seen (still never been to Mammoth or Whistler or any of those other places known for parks). Over 1000' vertical of features for every ability level.

Starting at the top riders have a choice of two lines: a beginner line with two, 20-foot step downs and a few smaller jibs or a more advanced line with some step-overs in the 50 foot range. Both lines funnel into a nice quarterpipe that actually slants from the ground on the beginner side up to your standard 18' (with a barrel and a mailbox on top). Downhill of the QP is a 50' table/hip combo followed by a long series of rollers, maybe 7 or 8. Then, another choice. I never rode right, but from the top I could see a series of medium-strength rails and from the bottom, a medium-sized table (30'?). The line that always had my attention on the left? Not really a line at all, just a run-in to a single, massive hip (frontside for regular footers including Ben and me). The deck topped out around 50 feet up. Not that I ever went that high. Here's a poor, phone shot of it.

That's what happens when I leave my camera at home.

If you click through and look really close at the original, you can just see a rider leaving the lip. That's the best sense I can give of the bigness of it. It's about as close as I'll ever come to an Air & Style-type jump. The thing that got me was how long the run in was. You have so much time to think about how fast you're going and how much speed compression your legs are dealing with and how you can't see anything but the face of this bitch that I usually chickened out and speed-checked my way to a meager few feet of air. It was scary and fun all at the same time. Varying amounts of wax left in my base made things even more complex. I only caught significant air probably twice and they consisted of touching tindy and rolling down the windows. I'll get it next time.

Speaking of next time. As my title this post questions, what is the end of a season when you live by a resort that's open 'til September? How long do you have to go without to have the first day of the season feel like the first day? I took a month off when I got hurt, but it didn't feel like a beginning when I got back at it. Just another continuation. Snowboard seasons change just like natural seasons. Powder comes, turns to corn, then to slush. Some seasons are better suited to 50-foot hips some to 50-foot cliffs some to 50-foot-wide groomers. Sometimes you ride one of those wheeled contraptions and let your brain fill in the powder. Other times you open up a folder of DVDs and time travel your way to a better day.

Which reminds me, have you seen the new Isenseven teaser? So much fun!

Isenseven Let's Go Get Lost Teaser from ISENSEVEN on Vimeo.

Yak Sighting

This one's straight off Mike Watt's van. Thanks to Draplin for the shot.

Mood Swings

The ride home Sunday went quick like it always does. Recounting the day's glory with a friend whilst jamming on some ridiculous 80's music (in this case DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince). When I got home and shut the door it crept in, was that the last day of the season? It sure felt like it. All outerwear was overkill. More bikinis than puffies. More sunblock than face shots. It was so sunny out that even with shades on (that's sunglasses, not even goggles) I thought it was a little too bright. The double shot of rub-on wax. What was I surfing? The climbers outnumbered the riders. It all added up to summertime. For a snowboarder, it's more like bummertime...

I feel like I missed out on half the season between the rib injury and the seizure. With Timberline and her glacier even summer means doing the ole slip slide on the shred sled, but I'm no park shark, I'm a pow hound. The prospect of getting stuck up to my nipples in the fluff and having to swim out (a prospect I once feared), I will now miss until December. Thank Goddess for Baldface. The season's (though not my wallet's) savior. Only 10 months 'til next time...

Then, out of nowhere I get this e-mail. It's from Kristy, our cat driver at Baldface.'I finally got those photos for you,' she says. Let me see...

Providing motivation through another summer (Kristy Herauf photo)

... and four more shots of me on a field of white with few other tracks. How sweet! Shots that could depress me just make me even more stoked to do what I do and be where I am. How could I possibly be depressed when I'm so blessed. I live next door to the longest riding season anywhere and I was bumming on powder!? Internal bitch slap delivered. (A southern hemisphere gig would still be all-time if anyone has a hookup)

It's always fun to hit some jumps. Sometimes they're cliffs to pow and sometimes they're windlips to flat. One just teaches you how to tweak a Japan quicker. Natural terrain up here never goes away, the landings just get closer. Seriously, I could go up there in July and get that same feeling!? What's better? Slide over the snow and soar through the air. It's all a matter of perspective. Get what you can while you can and hang the board up only when you have to. Besides, Ben's still down to ride. I'll be up there celebrating Memorial Day. When Timberline finally shuts down in September, I'll be ready with the bike and skateboard. Making the most of my off-season to come back strong, ribs healed (they still hurt, if you can believe it) and brain under control. Wreck, rise, repeat...

Gone 'Til November?

Sunday was one of those days we all need more of. Sleeping with the windows open left me feeling amazingly refreshed in the morning when I woke up sans alarm. Then I looked at the clock and it was only 6. Ben, my ride to the mountain, wouldn't get here 'til 8. Another hour and a half snooze and I was taking that so familiar trip down 26. This time we cut out early and headed up the Timberline road, seeing as it's the only resort that's still open. We were greeted by the mountain in all her glory as we pulled into the lot.

Beautiful day (likewise for the shirt and 'stache?) B-Tru photo

It was a hot one. The 7am report said 50° and I wouldn't doubt 70° by the afternoon. The conditions matched, getting softer and then slushier as the day progressed.

Yeah, she skied in that, too. B-Tru on the guerrilla photo

A parking lot full of cars didn't bode well, but it turned out to be a lot of climbers. So many, in fact, that it was harmfully crowded. We witnessed a heli evacuation of one who had something fall from above and go right through his helmet. I forget whether it was ice or a crampon.

The riding was actually pretty fun. The natural features are still there and Timberline knows how to build a park. Unfortunately, most of their man-made features are beyond my skill level. One thing I was pleasantly surprised by was their mini-pipe. I'm no halfpipe rider, but when I made a run through this scaled-down tube (but still with vert), I realized why people like it. Something about starting out on an 18-footer is just counter-productive to fun. If the first jump or cliff I ever had to hit was a pro-sized 80 feet, I probably wouldn't do those either. Just another thing Meadows could learn from Timberline on the park front.

OK, the windows are down now, Ben.
(Check the Oakley-down-the-leg pants!)

After a trip back to the car for a rub-on wax job we made our final foray. We soaked in the clear view from the top of Palmer. We hiked a particularly fun hip (pictured above). We poked fun at the clothes people wear on such hot days at the mountain (pictured farther above). We turned shades of red reminiscent of Rush's face mid-rant. And I didn't even need to use my AK. Well, you know the rest. Still not sure whether I'll get another day in, but if that was the final chapter, I'm OK with it. Fun, friends, ridiculous moustache, sun, Hawaiian shirt; who could ask for more?

With Friends Like Pros...

Disclaimer: Don't follow any of these links if you don't want a cheesy rap song about (mostly) skiing stuck in your head.

I'm probably the last person to see it, but this video is about as good as they come. Especially the fact that it was for a huckfest contest. They were just in it to have fun and not to win; true shred ethic. To my ears, it sounds as good as any rap song out there, but that's not exactly my cup of Earl Grey. I also dig that some kids did a cover version. It's as good as any internet phenomenon. I'd rather watch that than some video of a cat flushing a toilet, for example. It's like skiing's answer to Gunther. High-larious!

What's not to like about this really. You could make a cover version for almost anything. Say you have a friend who's a poker pro and you're at a home poker tournament. It might come up. Perhaps your friend is a professional race car driver and you're riding shotgun. This song will find it's way into your head no matter what. And by 'this song' I mean the phrase, 'my friend's a pro.' Be sure to check out the full website and some of the writeups.

Where's snowboarding's internet sensation? Party Snake never made it. Gryme Tyme (AKA Mitch Reed)? I never know if he's serious or not. I'm thinking he is, but hoping for not. I just don't have my finger on the pulse well enough. Someone tell me what's up.

Chronological Aberration

Is anyone else reading Jeremy Jones' AK-Deeper posts!? Better question, is anyone else wondering why Teton Gravity Research (best company name ever, by the way) and Brain Farm had to pick the same year to start/release their two-year projects? One more, is 2010/11 the year Jeremy Jones wins every award like Travis Rice did this year? Or will TRice just win them all over again. I mean did you see that crevasse gap!? Jeremy Jones just grabs method. Wait, actually he claims first descents on some of the hairiest lines possible. Lines that he's probably the only living rider who can look at them and still keep his base layer clean, much less ride. And he still has the presence of mind to grab method. It's time for that guy to collect some props (but not for his command of grammar, that's on the level of a tween sending texts). I'm casting an early ballot for Jeremy Jones for rider of the year in 2010/11. Yeah and Flight + Deeper = more exploding heads than The Evil Dead. Just a prediction from this humble blogger. If only we could get them to alternate years with the insanity.

Banff Mountain Film Festival World Tour

What's better than being outside and playing around in the snow? Probably nothing, but the next best thing is surely watching others do likewise. Especially when they're insane-o pros. That's why the snow porn industry actually works. Turns out, people make videos about all kinds of other outdoor sports from BASE jumping to rock climbing and they're pretty cool, too. There's really only one place to go to watch all of the best under one roof: the Banff Mountain Film Festival.

The festival takes place every fall in late October to early November in Banff, Alberta, Canada. Problem is, Banff isn't exactly an international hub and tickets are about as scarce as sentences without the word 'like' in a high school cafeteria. Before you thumb a ride for the Canadian Rockies and sell a kidney to scalp seats, check this out: they take the best of 'em and bring them on a world tour. Not to say road trip adventures and renal dialysis aren't xtreeme, but maybe think about catching the show at a theatre near you instead. I took the plunge and I'm here with the rundown.

The festival ran three days at Portland's Bagdad Theater and all three days sold out. In fact, the show's closing on Thursday sold out in just a few days forcing me to scalp at the door. Black market organ harvest was averted by a kind patron who sold me an extra at face value. The format had a few short films (or sections from larger works), one feature length film, then an intermission, followed by more shorts. The whole night went about three hours after all the mandatory raffles and sponsor plugs.

Night one, a Wednesday, I went to with my friend Ben. We got there late-ish and ended up in the front row corner. Kinked neck city, population us. Fortunately, it would turn out to be the best night of programming of the three. The feature was called Journey to the Center and revolved around three BASE jumpers attempting a radical new project: a giant hole in the Earth in China called the Heavenly Pit. It had equal parts personal exposition, travel documentary and adrenaline-fueled action. It really had drama that I've never experienced in an outdoor film before. It was similar to First Descent, if you were to watch it never having snowboarded. Lots of great storytelling and at the end they do something that's never been done before and could easily kill someone. Easily the best film of the tour. Some other highlights from that day include a couple of cute animations. One from Switzerland called The Cable Car and another from the US called Papiroflexia, which actually played all three nights and is available here. A cool animation, but it's no Rabbit. Haha. Another short was from a trials mountain bike movie called Crux. For the uninitiated, trials is all about balance as a biker hops from obstacle to obstacle and/or rides across narrower and narrower features. It's interesting at first, but gets repetitive or as Ben said, "It's like lesbian porn, it's nice and all, but it's just the same thing over and over."

Day two I learned my lesson and got there early. Surprisingly there was no line and I walked right to the front row and took a seat. I dropped my sweatshirt to save it and went out for food until the show started. The feature that night was about a woman who was a world champion para-glider who wanted to fly with eagles. In fact, it was called Flying With Eagles. She seriously bought a fledgling eagle, kept it at a zoo and got a falconer to help her train it. It was a cool story, but not that well made. It also got corny when the love story between her and the falconer came out. Yeah, they move in together. They also showed a section from TGR's Under the Influence. Which actually had some snowboarding. An unfortunately low amount of snowboarding on the tour, but that's what you get from a spring showing. There was a funny short called Patagonia Winter about a couple British guys who try to climb some mountains. They run into some bad luck and end up backing off more than they climb. It did feature some classic quotes, "When the chips are down, he'll be the one eating the chips." Now that I mention it, that might have been the first night. Anyway, a good show.

The final day I scalped tickets and the line was two blocks long. I still got front row seats because no one likes them. In that particular theater, there's no stadium seating and the seats don't go all the way up to the stage, so front row is a great seat. I did the same seat save trick as in previous nights and missed out on sitting around for an hour. The feature that night was a rock climbing movie called The Sharp End. It had all kinds of crazy personalities and situations. Rock climbing is something I'd like to get into more. I go out a couple times a year and have a good time, but I've never made that big investment in gear to get past the gym. They showed part of a movie I've been looking forward to for a while, Rocky Mountain Sherpas' The Fine Line. This eclectic bit of celluloid tells the tale of the water cycle with emphasis on avalanche safety. Not a point-to-point narrative in any way, it's still an informative movie. I'm sure I'll buy it if only to see how/if it all comes together. One last movie I remember was Silent Snow, a documentary about communities in Greenland and how pollutants affect everything from seal meat to the ice sheet.

This fall, I'd like to make the trek to Banff to see all the movies for myself. Seeing only clips of some was little better than watching trailers. If I can't make it or don't get in, I'll take solace that the tour will be around. They even have showings in Antarctica, so check out the site and see when, not if, they're coming to your hood.