Digital Relapse Week?

Digital Detox Week went pretty well for me. We got great weather here in Portland, I got outside a bunch and even exercised some. When I did stay inside, I was catching up on reading and catching up with friends and family. The Banff Mountain Film Festival was in town, so that was three nights of entertainment (moron the specifics next post). I probably spent half an hour a day online. That was last week.

The first two days of this week have been a total relapse. I'm back to my old ways: staying at the computer all day, obsessively checking my e-mail, facebook and youtube as if something important is going to happen, blogging... How important is this writing that I do? Ultimately, I hope to find the middle road, perhaps an hour a day. It all starts with getting out there right now. The Banff Mountain Film Festival was pretty cool, though, you should go check that out.

Digital Detox: Unplug

Starting today, I'm celebrating Digital Detox Week. This week, proposed by the ad-free magazine AdBusters, I'll be limiting my usage of all forms of digital technology. My goal is to use my computer once per day and only to check personal e-mail and only use my cell phone to make calls. No social networking, no text messaging, no online shopping or gaming, only communication. I'm hoping to find a happy medium with my technology use because I know I currently spend way too much time on the computer (for one example). Learn more at the link below, including studies on the ill effects of excessive digi-consumption...

See you next week!

Silver Star Mountain Resort: Maybe if I was a Rich Skiier

Back at the beginning of the season, my friend Suzanne and I went to the Warren Miller movie. The movie would have been entirely a letdown if not for the fact that we had a "Price is Right" moment at intermission. When it came to the big prize of the evening, a three day trip to Silver Star Mountain Resort in BC, it was her name that got called to come on down. There was much high five-ing and jumping around.

Then the waiting began. . . By the time we heard back from the crew at Warren Miller and/or Silver Star, it was March. It was April before we could synchronize schedules and roll out. But seriously, can you turn down three nights of lodging and three days of riding even if you do have to drive (in my case, just ride) eight hours to get there? Well we couldn't. The crew we ended up with was Suzanne, her brother Thomas and me.

The drive was quite rainy - April in the Northwest - but amazingly scenic when the clouds did break. We went through almost every possibly type of weather along the way, including some dense fog that had Suzanne freaking out when we finally got to the mountain road. We made it just fine and had time to check out the little village before racking out for the night. It was a pretty standard mountain village with a couple bars, a couple shops, a store, a bunch hotels and houses taking up as much space as the rest combined. The only difference was, everything is painted super bright! It was like mountain village Disney.

I was just waiting for them to sing, "It's a Small World."

The bonus, of course, was that when we woke up, the chairlift was a five-minute walk/ride away. That's something you don't get on Mt. Hood without a stay at Timberline Lodge.

Our digs were right behind the one on the left.

The riding itself was OK, too. We got to experience every possible type of weather on the mountain, just like on the road. Day 1 was the national championships for 13 and 14 year old ski racers, so one side of the mountain was packed with spandex-clad kids with two sets of skis each. Of course, that was the side with the steeps and good pow. Unfortunately, that side also required the world's longest traverse to get into and out of. Seriously, it was two miles each way. My calves went on strike until I showed them the light powder among legit glades.

The sun came out on day 2 and afforded us some grand views from the top. The Okanagan Valley spread out before us and I was again thanking the hotel for the complimentary lip balm/sunblock.

Clouds just rolling in to mess up my shot.

Today was mostly about the park. They've only got one, but they way they set it up, that's all they need. It was really well set up with features of every size. Maybe that's what corporate sponsorship affords a snowboard park. The bigger jumps looked a little sketchy, with their Wu-Tanged out lips and short space between, but the medium features were right on. The park staff at Mt. Hood Meadows could take a hint or two from these guys. The pumping music was a good touch, too. We finished up the day on the other side of the mountain with some nice glades, natural hits and all-around Northwest-style riding. Annoyingly, there was a bit of unfinished construction to contend with. The stuff on the actual run was roped off and actually made for a fun side-trip, but one of the trails seemed to go out of its way for what I can only assume is development that has yet to happen. I mistakenly hit that trail once, ended up hiking a half an hour out, and rode in fear of it the rest of the trip.

By far the most annoying part of the trip, however, was the lift attendents. I've never seen lifties do less. On the bright side, the lifts almost never slowed down. On the down side, one chair ride up, Thomas's "foot slipped off his board" (a likely story) sending his board sideways and on top of mine. He managed to get off the lift, but it was already turning the corner by the time I tried to bail. Let's just say I unsuccessfully exited into some powder off to the side (how my knee wasn't destroyed, I'll never know) and tripped the stop bar. All this time the lifty was chatting up a friend and drumming with a pop bottle on the lift speed controls. They actually laughed at us before even asking if we were OK! Unbelievable. I know they don't get paid much, but isn't that exactly the situation they are paid for? The only time they ever looked somewhat alive was at the end of the day, when one can assume an authority figure was about to check up on them. So lame.

On the whole, Silver Star has great terrain, but it's bizare layout leaves you scratching your head when you should be shredding. The allure of dry fluff and a nice park always holds sway, but this decimation resort with its dead lazy lifties won't see me back any time soon. Unless, of course, it's free...

Baldface 2009: How to Do It Up Right

So you've had a pass at your local resort for a few years. Snow phone is #1 on your speed dial. You know the blacks and double blacks better than your significant other's favorite movies. [Mine's is Princess Bride] You hit the trees harder than Snoop Dogg on Saturday night. You don't even get out of bed for less than eight inches anymore. You've even been known to get a little Xtreem in the gated access areas. All of this is great, but there's something missing. The steeps just don't feel that steep anymore and the more you travel the more all these resorts just look the same. You're wondering, what's next?

Your options are several. You could buy all the necessary avalanche gear, take all the classes and set out with a group of like-minded individuals in search of first descents (or just first for you). This is a great option, but can be complicated. Where do you go? Splitboard or sled? Maps? Snow camping? There must be an easier way. Of course there is. Enter option 2. Helicopters!

Guided heli operations (like other guided services) take much of the guesswork out of the equation. They have the equipment, the knowledge and the transportation. After an avalanche refresher, you'll find yourself on top of line after line of, well, whatever you want to ride. The catch is obvious, money. Heli time alone can easily exceed $2000 per hour and as long as those blades are spinning, you're paying. Lodging and food may or may not be included in the price, so the budget just gets steeper. Any chance of a less expensive and less complicated way to get out there? Yup, remote snowcat riding, like Baldface Lodge.

Someday all of this can be yours, if only for three days (Dave Thomas photo)

Snowcat operations have most of the access and convenience of helicopters without the cost. Baldface, for example costs anywhere from 550-775 Canadian dollars per day, all inclusive. So for the price of an hour of heli time, you just paid off a four-day trip to some of the best Canada has to offer. As far as transportation goes, cats are no slouch, either. Granted, they aren't as fast as choppers, but they're much faster than skinning up. I'd compare it to a long chairlift ride. Think of it like this: you ride down a steep-gladed pitch with some cliffs and pillows thrown in (never having to cross another's tracks, of course) and at the bottom is the lodge only the lodge then drives you up to another similar line and you repeat 13 more times throughout the day. That's what cat-boarding feels like. The cat is fully equiped with whatever you thought to bring. Lunch, extra layers, music, friends oh yeah and it's warm.

My only experience with snowcat lodges was Baldface, so here are some tips on how to get the most out of your trip. First off, you don't even have to bring your own board. If you don't, make your first stop the gear room. Pick out your board and tune it up to your preferences. They have wax, iron, files and anything else you might need. After that it will be about time for dinner. Eat well, the meals are always good. Next comes the biggest choice you will face every night, to party or not to party. You won't have much time to shake the hangover the next morning, so my advice is to take it easy and maybe work your way up. Take it from Benny...

Partying and riding harder than you, Benny Pelegrino (Johan photo)

I personally partied myself into a seizure and missed the last day of riding, so that's where my advice is coming from. Just remember how much money you threw down and how you're going to feel in the morning after a night of drinking at altitude and if you still want to bang a gong, well, here's the mallet. Obviously drinking isn't the only thing to do, they have a pool table, dart board, fireworks, a sauna, ping pong, video games (including one with a fake guitar). One last thing before bed, if you're the type who likes a snack, just ask the kitchen staff, they're pretty accommodating. Now get to sleep.

The first thing that goes down in the morning is a stretching/yoga class. It's up to you whether you want to sleep for that half hour or stretch. I tried it both ways and the jury's still out. The jury is not out on breakfast, it has come to a unanimous verdict that breakfast is necessary. Any sucker caught skipping breakfast will serve a sentence of 5-10 runs of bad turns and general fatigue. Seriously, with all the options available, no one goes hungry at Baldface. After breakfast, pack a lunch, son, 'cuz it's gonna be a long day. When in doubt, pack more. You can always trade grade school style on the cat. Speaking of which, one time, in sixth grade, I traded a kid my apple for a Caramello bar. No joke. Then, I traded that for a granola bar and a bag of fruit snacks. And somehow I'm not a stock broker. That kid is probably a Franciscan monk with that kind of restraint and discipline. But I digress. At the end of the trip, I was packing a sandwich (they will have at least six options on any given day), two granola bars, an orange and a dessert bar (usually two options). Oh and don't forget that water bottle. Hydration is key, especially if you made it a late night or endulged in the sauna. Each cat is equipped with a milk crate size water cooler in case you should run out. As for the riding, if you're coming from resorts it will be the best time you've ever had. It takes some getting used to, so if this is your first time, start slow. The guides are there for you and they're smart enough to avoid potential hazards. Your mind gets to focus on avoiding trees and not avioding avalanches. However, don't stray too far from the guide's tracks lest you wander into unknown territory. After you're sufficiently jelly-legged the mobile lodge will deposit you back at the stationary lodge where hot soup and appetizers will be waiting. My routine went something like snack, beer, nap, shower, dinner. Sometimes I threw a sauna in there. Dave will show slides of the days action right before dinner, so don't miss it, especially on the days he was in your cat. Then, well, the routine (if you can really call this routine) repeats until they take you back to Nelson (via heli or cat and boat, just as you came) or as I like to call it, reality. Make sure and get the contact info of your new friends, so you can plan the next year's trip.

Everyone's friends on a powder day (Dave Thomas photo)

Baldface 2009: Electrical Brainstorm

Day 4 started out like all the other days. Woke up feeling woozy and slightly nauseated. All the booze the night before couldn't have helped.

Now that reminds me. I never mentioned the night before. One of the dishwashers, known as Boney M, celebrated his birthday that night. Now, I don't know if it's a Canadian thing or a Baldface thing, but instead of a regular birthday spanking, we treated him to a spank tunnel. Here's how it works: all involved line up front to back with legs spread. Yeah, imagine humping the person in front of you from behind with a wide stance, then imagine a long line of this and you have the right idea. The birthday boy then crawls on his hands and knees through the tunnel formed by the spread legs. As he passes through, each person spanks him. Sounds easy, eh? Well, kitchen staff had at him with spoons and baking sheets. People from the front went around to the back after he had crawled through, so as to make a neverending tunnel. I'm sure he couldn't sit comfortably for a week. Makes me happy my birthday is in May. I don't want to be anywhere near snowboarders when it happens. I don't feel so bad for Boney, though. Think about it, dude washes dishes at a primo backcountry lodge. If he doesn't get to sample the savory goods on occasion, then I feel for him.

Also, all the Jesus talk came to a head. You see, 12 people fit in a cat and Jesus had 12 disciples. Didn't take long before we rounded up the posse and took this picture:

Accompanied by riotous rounds of "Jesus is Just Alright"

OK, back to the past present. Day 4. I'm eating breakfast. In this case, granola with 2%. Not much is going down. Idle chatter. How about some tea? Then, I go down. I wake up with Greg, the snow expert, standing over me looking concerned. "You had a seizure." No shit? The granola wasn't that bad. Martin was sticking me with an IV and a small crew was whisking me away to be evacuated via helicopter. Not exactly how I envisioned my first heli trip, but I guess I don't have many outs. At this point, I should mention that this is actually my second seizure. I had my first a year ago in Aspen. I was told it was a fluke. Guess even doctors can be wrong. Now that I've had two unprovoked seizures, I officially have epilepsy. What that means to me is two pills per day to keep it at bay. No driving for three months. Oh yeah and a one beer maximum per day (maybe two if I space them out well enough). How's that for weak. No, I can't save up drinks through the week and carry them over to a Saturday night. No, a 40oz. of OE is not one beer. I'm talking one 12oz. beer (or equivalent of other alcohol). Why don't they just give me a curfew and let me fully relive 15?

In new news, I've undergone a battery of tests and things are looking up. The meds are doing their job and nothing else is wrong with me. Basically, we wait and see. My next appointment is in six months. Coasting.

One good thing to come out of this is all of the great people around me. I thought I knew how rad the snowboarding community was, then this happened. I'm truly blown away. I've had dozens of people that I've known for less than a week offering their support. That means so much to me it's given me misty eyes multiple times. People are just amazing. There's no other way to say it. So many beautiful people are united just by the love of snow. If there's one thing I want to pass along more than anything else it's that: go out and meet your fellow riders, you'll be stoked on the folks you see.

Good people, spank tunnel notwithstanding

For my next entry, a full-on course in how to get the most out of your backcountry lodge experience. The dos, don'ts, ins, outs and what have you. Not one to miss. Seriously, that last one was skipable, but not this next one...

Sprung?

Now that I'm back in Portland (moron that later) I was all set to update the blog in grand fashion. Problem is it's sunny and 70 outside, so the update will have to wait 'til tonight at the earliest. If you're in Portland and inside right now, I implore you, get outside now! If you must remain inside, at least open all the windows and/or walk around in the buff. Spring is in the air, your pale ass should be also.

Baldface 2009: The New Old Milwaukee - It Doesn't Get Much Better

Day 2 was when things started clicking. I mounted up the Fish 156, added a little extra lunch to the bag and strapped my balls on a little tighter. Another 10cm of fresh had our tracks from the previous day covered. Oh yeah, we were getting some. With avy school taken care of, we headed straight for the trees.

Jesse Lu is leading a stoked crew

Our new sweeper guide, Karla, ever vigilant

Now for those of you who have any doubt that cat boarding is worth your money, I produce these photos, all of yours truly and taken by Dave Thomas (just like the rest of the photos on this page, lest you thought I learned how to take pictures real quick)...

Add your own whooshing sound

Like a girl with no ass, the pow was bottomless

Sorry, Dave, I still owe you a beer

Face shots for breakfast, pillow pops for lunch and plenty of pow snacks in between. I'm not getting all ballsy with the cliff drops, but my new buddy Martin is going for it and he has me thinking. You see with the powder piling up, a 20-foot cliff cliff feels like jumping on a bed. I'll get that jazz next time, this day was fun enough whipping high-speed slashes and getting that zero-G feeling in the white room. It just kept getting better.

When not contemplating cliff drops, Martin is an ER doc.
Who takes care of him if he lands on that tree?

Dr. Martin exhibiting clinical precision yet again

Day 3 would prove to be my final day riding. And with days like that, I'm not sure it gets any better anyway. I went with the 156 Fish LTD, which felt just like the Fish to me. Great board for the conditions. That woozy feeling was still creeping up in the morning, but once the fresh mountain air and snow hit my face, I was feeling great. Unstoppable really. Best day riding yet. I felt indestructible. I'm sure I didn't hit anything that huge, but the feeling was there. So much time in the white room you'd think I was paying rent. A couple cliffs, a few hits and powdery turns all day long. My legs were holding up surprisingly well for a guy who was just coming off of injury [that damn rib is still in pain, too]. I was on the six Advil a day diet, though.

Just for fun, at the end of the day Karla drove the cat and Kristy was our guide. Karla even had to ask where the windshield wipers were, talk about a newb. Then Kristy got us lost. Maybe they need a little more practice. Speaking of a little more practice, we rode back to the lodge instead of taking the cat and I 'tripped' on the sidewalk by the chalets. Whoops. And that's how I'm going out. The next day at breakfast, the lights went out. I'll talk about that one in the next post.